Call me an eternal optimist or maybe naive, but I am always a bit flabbergasted by the negative reactions people have to different situations. I think I notice it most with adoption stuff maybe just because I am more prepared to hear negative comments in regards to that. I don't know. We've never really had an overt, negative comment. But what we do get are questions, often with some implied negatives. Things like "Who does their hair? It must take hours." (Nothing wrong with the question or assuming it must be a time consuming process but it does come from the slant that assumes I would not know how to do it. And I realize most of the questions like this are more about people being curious than negative or mean. But it does get a little old, answering the same questions over and over when they all have an underlying negative vibe.)
More recently, if someone knows Zeke has different hands than the recent of us, I have heard "Wow! How will you manage?" (Again, I'm not really offended. I just think it's kind of an odd question.) I think that one probably gets me more than others because it's not like he is the only child in the world who is missing a hand and has limited usage of his fingers. I usually just say some quick response like "I'm sure we'll be just fine. Kids are pretty adaptable and it's the only way he's ever known." I'm guessing most people who ask that haven't really thought their question through because I seriously doubt that they think he will just sit around and be a bump on a log because he's missing a hand/fingers.
That said, for those who have wondered, there are plenty of people who have gone before us. (And plenty who will go after.) And some of those who have gone before us are willing to share just how they do things. So here you go, two of my favorite blogs which are full of ideas and inspiration for people whose hands work differently than the rest of us: Living One Handed and My Special Hand. From shooting a basketball to using scissors to playing with legos, all sorts of creative and ingenious ways to problem solve. (And can't I say how hopeful I am that Zeke will be an amazing problemsolver simply because his hands force him to be. What an amazing thing, to have weaknesses become strengths because they force you to look at life differently.) Anyway, the blogs are well worth a peek if you've ever wondered how that guy who has no hand does that.