God and Me-Ebb and Flow

Lately I have found myself frustrated over the ebb and flow how I spend my time with my God.  A week and a half ago, I found myself starting my day with the words, "Still before the Lord, before the throne of God I fall...I fall prostrated and low, humbled and ready."  And it seemed as if, for that day, I was not just stuck in my rut of "do my quiet time and cross it off the list."  It seemed like my day was full of God, like me and Him where thick as thieves and bossom buddies.  It was relaxing and refreshing.

Then Tuesday hit and I managed to miss God altogether.  Same with Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday.  How is it that I can go from moments of spiritual clarity and true worship to moments of deliberately avoiding spending the time I need to with the Lord.  I'm not saying that I didn't think about spiritual things at all.  Obviously, it is not having a set quiet time that brings you into a state of worship.  Just that when it came time to focus or to sacrifice my time to do things that might have drawn me closer to God, I chose not to.  I'd like to blame my kids or my lack of sleep or my busy schedule.  But the reality it it's not that-it's me.  Why is it feast or famine? 

Just thankful for a God who sees that in me but loves me anyway...

I wrote the above words Thursday night.  And funnily enough, this morning (Friday) as I was doing my quiet time from My Utmost for His Highest, these were the words, "We have all had times on the mount, when we have seen things from God's standpoint and have wanted to stay there, but God will never allow us to stay there.  The test of our spiritual life is the power to descend.   It is a great thing to be on the mount with God but a man only gets there in order that afterwards he may get down among the devil-possessed and lift them up.  We are not built for mountians...those are for moments of inspiration, that is all.  We are built for the valley, for the ordinary stuff we are in, and that is where we have to prove our mettle."  Such true words about how we cannot be consumed by spiritual ideals and instead must be practical and come down to earth a bit and actually live life.