Monday, March 2, 2009

What's Worked for Us-Nighttime Sleeping

We had decided before Kenson came home that we would not be a co-sleeping family. There is much adoption literature that says that this is good for bonding and advocates this. And I know many families who have done this and done well with it. But it's not for us. Call me selfish if you wish but I need my bedroom to be "my" space to some degree. I need to sleep without having a toddler kick me and moosh me.

We toyed with just having Kenson sleep in a bed in our room but to me that seemed it would be adding just another transition into the mix. So we decided on sleeping on an air mattress on the floor of Kenson's room. We started by letting him fall asleep in between us on the air mattress and then moving him to his crib. We tried to make sure one of us was in the bedroom at all times once he fell asleep just in case he woke up.

He has slept through all but 2 nights since he has been home. (Thank You, Jesus!) So after seeing him sleep so soundly, we decided to not worry so much about being in the room with him once he fell asleep but to instead make sure someone was on the same floor of the house as him. But either way, we slept on the air mattress next to the crib for about a week and half.

One morning, I had gotten up to shower and D was sound asleep on the air mattress. Kenson woke up and for whatever reason didn't crawl up on the mattress next to D. He instead came into the bathroom and found me. We decided then to do a few more days of sleeping on the air mattress and then we would start sleeping in our own bed. (We're only a short walk down the hall from Kenson's room.) We figured that if he was confident enough to get out of bed and come find me in the shower, then he would do the same if we were in our bedroom.

So we continued to put him to sleep on the air mattress, next to us. We would then move him to his crib later that night. And then we would sleep in our bedroom.

Next transition-letting Kenson fall asleep in his crib on his own. Before we moved him to the crib on his own, for several nights, I left chocolate chips on the sheets for him to find as a good night surprise. I wanted him to associate the crib with good things and for him to practice getting in and out of it on his own as he crawled in to get the chocolate chips.

And just recently we have gone to having him fall asleep on his own, without Mom or Dad in the room. I started moving around more during his naptime and he had been falling asleep regardless of where I was in the house during naptime. So, we decided to try it with nighttime sleeping. We still stay upstairs and the first few nights, I wandered in and out of the hallway and his room so he knew I was still around. But he seems to be doing good with falling asleep on his own.

Kenson loves to come upstairs to go to bed. I think that's because he loves the routine of brushing his teeth and putting on pajamas and reading books and rocking. One of our favorites books right now is called "Counting Kisses". It counts down from 10 to 1, with each number representing a unique way of kissing a baby good night. Kenson giggles and giggles at all of the kissing, from 10 kisses on the toes to 2 kisses on sleepy eyes. It's a great book for attachment. We have also really liked the books "Please Puppy" and "Baby, Please" by Spike Lee. They both have simple rhymythic store lines and great African American characters.

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