Anger feels so much better than sadness – anger is powerful, sorrow is terrifying.
Anger feels like control. If deep grief, fear, and sorrow come the surface, those feelings may never stop and that is terrifying.
Their family is currently walking a really hard road with an adoptive daughter who is struggling which is why Lisa felt like she should share a bit on the connection between anger and sorrow. I just found it very profound, not just for adopted kids. For someone is grieving the loss of a parent or a child. For the mom, trying to help a child who seems angry often or who who is quick to anger. For someone who feels betrayed by a spouse or a friend.
For one of mine, there is a lot of anger that often bubbles out over small things. This same child is also the one who vocalizes most often about his/her birth family and has cried the most for them. For this child, I think there is a lot of grief and sadness over the loss of his/her first mom and the chance that he/she had to be with that mom. And while there are tears of true sadness and grief, I think there are also a lot of outbursts, overreactions, and frustrated moments that come not because of the situation at hand but because of a thinly dug graveyard of not quite matured emotions.
Anger makes you feel strong and in control. Anger makes you feel powerful not powerless. Anger is just much easier than feeling deep hurt. Truth for us all, followed by God's truth as to who He created us to be.
"For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline." 1 Timothy 1:7
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